It validated many concepts I have about friendship, group dynamics, and honesty. You will learn what you want to from the book, and therein lies the "danger" in my recommendation.įull disclosure: I vicariously got something out of my system, learned about the human being, and myself.
It also tells a story, and effortlessly, such that rays of life’s truths stream though the filter of (every) author’s unavoidable sins of omission. It is about the connection sex has to the self, and reveals much about the modern cultural condition. I.e., it is about self-discovery, self-esteem, self-worth. How did it change him? Does power corrupt? Esp. To make a long story short, he mastered the "art". The author is an NYT and then Rolling Stone reporter who, born and raised a geek, discovered this community of pickup artists. With the internet as catalyst, they formed a community, granting the unprecedented ability to share knowledge and methods.
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Finally, sexually -unaware or -sensitive folk (e.g., modest or religious individuals) won’t stomach the mildly graphic descriptions of what the protagonist lived through – ignorance is bliss, for them.Ī 'pickup artist' is an amateur social scientist who adopts a language of "technology" complete with acronyms and jargon in order to systematize interpersonal relations: in this specific instance, how to get girls into bed. Unethical people should have little interest in the book, as ethical-tension is the book’s essential content, and they can get more direct material online. (I admit my assumption that female readers can also gain these things from a man's story.)Īuthoritarians ask their authorities (clergy, philosophers, etc.) and skip the discovery process I describe. This book may make you question your unconscious assumptions or conscious decisions in this area. However, this presentation is backed up by his experience, and so we trust his authority.Īnd who is "we"?: non-authoritarian, ethical, sexually aware (not necessarily active) human beings who thoughtfully approach the question: What kind of relationship is a good one? Because before we even seek an Other, we must choose: wordless college hook-up, one-night stand, short term "friend", long term friend "to have fun with", companion, life partner, or spouse/best-friend to start a family with (or yet something else). The author walks down roads, and perhaps comes to conclusions, that ultimately reflect an eerily familiar set of values. THE GREAT novelty in this book is simple: credibility. You'll know if it's for you after reading the first 10 pages.
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I found it at once the modern man's sefer musar of choice, and the endgame of every single Reality TV show ever made.
But this book tells a story of ethical tension that is, hands down, the most powerful treatise on morals and group dynamics I have ever read.
It may not be interpreted kindly that an Orthodox rabbi (in training) reads *this* widely. You'll know I know I'm taking a risk by even acknowledging its existence and my familiarity with its contents. I know I'm taking a risk by even acknowledging its existence and my familiarity with its contents.
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